If you’re like me, you wish you had a simple formula in responding to others especially during tense times. Use of these 4 words will create success that can change your life. This is critical for everyone, when tested. There was no better test for me than parenting my children. I remember a particularly stressful season with my 2 then young children when I spotted a bumper sticker that read, “Is it Wise, Kind, and Truthful?” Bingo! I had something I could remember and latch on to. But, over time, I realized I said things that just weren’t necessary to verbalize.
This happened on the flip side, too. I heard things that weren’t necessary and detracted from the intent of the conversation. So I added “…and Necessary?” My goal, now, is to have my response meet all 4 criteria. When I follow this, a lot of hurt and pain is avoided; mine and the person I’m communicating with. If what I want to say doesn’t meet all 4, I don’t open my mouth. It really is that simple.
BONUS: If someone says something particularly harsh or puzzling, just ask them, “Was that wise, kind, necessary and truthful?”